What's on My Mind

*I have gotten my feelings hurt over a couple of different incidents in the last couple of days, and I have been trying to follow the advice my friend Tonya gave me (that she received from a good friend). When you want to vent, you can vent 3 different times to 3 different people (which is easy to do considering I have 4 sisters before I even start counting friends), and then you have to drop it and try to get over it...end of story. I found that this is really helpful. Venting is good, but sometimes when I vent too much, I end up getting more worked up reliving the whole scenario again and again. If I get my venting over with and commit to being done, it is much easier to get my head and heart in a more forgiving place. The thing is.... life is too short to waste your precious time and energy on things that don't really matter, because often the things I get hurt over are not that important in the grand scheme of things. I can sometimes make myself physically sick when I worry about something, and that does not help me be a good mom/wife in the present. I so wish that I was a little less sensitive, but while I continue to work on that, I can at least work on letting go of things a little faster. Have you ever noticed people who are always dwelling on the negative and making little things into big drama? I don't want to be one of those people. I also realized that I am not very good often times at taking my feelings to Heavenly Father to help me heal. I need to be better about that. We are not meant to heal on our own.
What do you all do to help shake things off that bother you? I have to say that I think my pregnant hormones automatically put a few strikes against me. I feel a little more negative/tired/cynical when I am hormonal, so I look forward to a more normal Kara (which will happen when..... since I will be nursing for a long time??).
*Day lights savings time really sucks. My little guy who used to wake up at 6:00, now consistently wakes up between 5:00-5:30, and sometimes earlier. On the positive side, it definitely makes it less painful to wake up early to go walking with my neighbor when I am already up :). I am in such a better mood when I exercise in the morning, and I come home in a happy mood. That is how I need to start my day. I am not so much of an early morning person, but I am realizing that as life gets busier and busier, I will have to make exercising a priority in the morning or it probably won't happen.

*I am happy to say that both of my kids dress themselves almost every day. Sometimes their outfit choices are unique, but most days I don't even fight it, because I want to reinforce the fact that my kids can dress themselves!! Gabe usually ends up with his underwear and pants on backwards, but he doesn't seem to mind, so I guess I shouldn't since I'm not the one with the wedgie :).

*We are taking a break from Sofia's preschool in the winter. Sofia loves her preschool, and although it is a great preschool, it involves a ton of work and coordination from the parents (it is a co-op preschool). For awhile I was feeling kind of crappy like, "What of parent am I not to be able to even handle doing preschool?" My mom was here last Friday and saw how hard it is to get Gabe out of the door in the morning after him waking up at 5:00 (he is a homebody who loves playing at home), and the whole process that includes insane parking, walking with both kids, finding something to do with Gabe since there isn't a ton of time to go home, and then dealing with parking and a tantruming Gabe as I try to peel him away from Sofia's classroom, and all of the volunteering in the classroom and childcare swapping I do with other parents when they are volunteering. My mom (the mother of 6 children) asked me how I planned on adding a baby to that chaos in January. It was so good to hear permission and validation from someone who has raised 6 children, that I was maybe trying to do too much with a new baby thrown into the equation. Thanks mom. Sofia loves preschool, but I will take the kids to an art class once a week so she still has something special, and I can do fun stuff with her at home. I also will be taking a break from teaching in the winter, and I am really feeling like it is best for my family right now to simplify as much as possible so we can all make a smooth transition to new baby Becerra.

*My kids continue to be as cute as ever. Yesterday, I was mean to Gabe when he was trying to wrestle with me and accidentally kicked me in the face. He ran off to his room to cry (he likes to pout in private). Sofia immediately ran to his room to try to comfort him, and I heard her saying, "Are you okay Gabe? You just made a mistake didn't you? We all make mistakes Gabe, but it's okay Gabe, we can all repent." I sat in the other room laughing and amazed. Whose child is that?? Not that we don't try to teach her good things, but I feel like she is more spiritually in tune than I am half of the time. My kids love each other so much, and that is one of the things that brings me the greatest joy. I hope that even when they fight, that they will always love each other this much.
*Speaking of living in the moment, I need to stop this long post, I have a little boy who wants some book reading and snuggling.

Quick Book Reviews

I have read a lot in the last couple of months. Sorry not to share more detail, but with the pregnancy brain and hormones I am experiencing right now, aren't you just impressed that I am reading at all :)??

-I have mixed feelings about this book. It is definitely a quick read and interesting, but I would say that I prefer a couple of the books below if you were going to choose which to start with. It is about a college student who was kidnapped (fictional), and confined in a small room of a shed for several years. During the years, she bears a child from the kidnapper, and the book is actually told from the voice and perspective of the 5 year old son. I don't want to ruin too much, but the book is mostly about their escape and it speaks to me about the love of a mother. Like I said, it is good (and a bit depressing), but read "The Help" first if you are looking for a good book.

-Good old Dr. Sears... you gotta love the dude. Although Dr. Sears can be a fairly predictable dude at times (baby wearing, nursing, good nutrition etc...), this book actually had some very good info in it. Obviously we all know that eating a lot of processed crap would logically affect children's behavior negatively, but it was very interesting to read about what processed foods to do the brains of growing kids (and actually change its' composition). We also hear a lot of high fructose corn syrup and partially hydrogenated oils being no no's in foods, but I wondered more about other additives and preservatives. It was good to get a list of other additives not to feed kids and some of the specific reasons why. I also really liked how Dr. Sears says that before ever prescribing medicine for a kid for disorders like adhd, he insists on a complete diet and lifestyle change to see how much of the problem behavior is caused by poor health. I feel like we are pretty healthy, but we have a ways to go until I am happy with my family's nutrition. For those of you who have "bad eaters" who are used to a lot of junky foods, it may be harder to change bad habits, but it is not too late. A lot of people talk about how eating healthy is more expensive than eating poorly, but Dr. Sears claims that you will save money in the long run not having to deal with the life long Dr. bills that come with bad health. Good nutrition/health is a wonderful gift to give to our children, and I want to do a better job.

-This was one of the best books that I have read in a really long time. I was worried at first as it is pretty long, but I wanted to spend every spare second I had reading it. The book explores what the lives were like for different black maids in Alabama in the 60's (the book is fictional but realistic). The author gives the best detail and voices to each character. Please oh please read this book and let me know what you think. Loved it!!

-This was another great book. I was skeptical at first wondering if I would like a fiction novel based off of Old Testament characters (Dinah and the wives and posterity of Jacob), but it was actually really interesting. I liked the perspective it gave of what life could possibly be like for the wives of Jacob. I read this one awhile ago, so it is not as fresh in my mind, but it was another stay up late at night read.

5 Years Old!!

I have a five year old. It's true. Sofia actually just informed me that she is almost 6 now. Why are they so anxious to grow up? I swear being a grown up is not that cool :). Here are some things to remember about Sofia right now:
*She is really tall. She is almost always way taller than most of her little friends and playmates.
*She is such a nurturing little gal. I know that she is going to be such a big help when the baby is born, and I have a feeling that I am going to need it! She is always mothering Gabe, which is sweet but I'm sure that it will annoy him someday :).
*This girl has the kindest heart. The other day Gabe last his one allotted piece of Halloween candy for the day because he wouldn't listen to me. Sofia immediately said, "It's okay Gabe, I'll pick something out that I can share with you." She is constantly doing things like this, and she is concerned about how others are feeling.
*Girlfriend has a wonderful zest for life. Yes she is loud and pretty much has no concept of using an indoor voice, but there is no denying that she is a happy girl.
*She is destined for great things. I don't know what her future holds, but I know there are great things to come for this girl.
We love this girl so much and our family wouldn't be complete without her.

My brother and his family stopped by for some birthday fun.


Most of the girl cousins. I love fall here, The leaves are so beautiful right now. Not so excited about having to rake them all up though :).


Sofia opening this beautiful blanket that Grandma Sharon knit for her. Isn't it amazing??


Sofia doing an art project with cousins. I made clear gelatin for the kids, and they played with it and shot colors in with medicine droppers. Fun, but a little messier than I thought :)

Sofia dressed up as Little Bo Peep for Halloween.

If You're Happy and You Know It

We did a quick photo shoot with the kiddos today. Sweet little munchkins. Here are some of my favorites:










Oh, and on another note, I saw this random article on yahoo, and who knows where all of this "research"/info comes from, but I thought it would be fun to assess how things add up for me in the happy department :) according to this article.

1)You were a smiley student

Adults with the biggest grins in their college yearbook pictures were up to 5 times less likely to be divorced decades later than those who looked less happy, according to a new DePauw University study. A smiler’s positive disposition may attract other happy people or rub off on a spouse.
*I was quite smiley in my year books thank you very much.


2)You have a sister

People with at least one female sibling report better social support, more optimism, and better coping abilities, according to a study presented at the British Psychological Society’s annual conference. Sisters appear to encourage communication and cohesion in families.
*I have 4 sisters. Score..... that must give me extra happiness points. It's true, having sisters is the best.


3)You're not glued to the TV

The happiest people spend 30% less time parked in front of the tube, according to a University of Maryland study that analyzed 34 years of data from more than 45,000 Americans. They’re more likely to spend time socializing, reading, or attending religious services—habits that are linked to better moods and health.
*We have no channels in our house, and I rarely watch t.v. shows online. I do however love me an online episode of "modern family."


4)You keep souvenirs on display

People who use mementos or photos to remind themselves of good times better appreciate their lives and are happier, says Sonja Lyubomirsky, PhD, a professor of psychology at University of California, Riverside. Good memories remind you of your “happiness potential” and promise that soon you can reach it again.
*I do have some souvenirs on display, but I am not much of a knick knack collecting kind of person... so maybe minus points for me? Chris has a lot of souvenirs on display, and he is quite the sentimental dude, so I guess he rules the happiness department in this area for our family.

5)You make exercise a priority

People who exercise more are less likely to be stressed and more likely to be satisfied with life, according to Danish researchers. Compared with sedentary people, joggers are 70% less likely to have high stress levels and life dissatisfaction, the study found. Couch potatoes who start moderate exercise—the equivalent of 17 to 34 minutes a day—experience the greatest happiness lift.
*I have been semi lameo this pregnancy in the exercise deparment, but I go walking with a neighbor, and in general, I am a pretty active person I would say.


6)You have a healthy love life

Physical intimacy is a key contributor to happiness, found a study by Dartmouth economist David Blanchflower, PhD, and Andrew Oswald, PhD, of England's University of Warwick. Married people report 30% more sex than singles, which may be one reason they also report being happier.
*I think I am doing pretty well in this department...especially for being 24 weeks pregnant. Enough (or maybe too much) said.


7)You hang out with happy people

Socializing with a cheerful person in your neighborhood increases the likelihood that you’ll be happy too, according to a new study. How often you get together matters most, say the researchers: People who live within half a mile of a buoyant buddy increase their odds of being happy by 42%. If the friend lives farther away (within a 2-mile radius), the chances drop to 22%—probably due to fewer get-togethers.
*I think I hang out with pretty happy people, and I have made a big effort lately to surround myself with positive happy people.

8)You stay warm with hot cocoa

Clutching a steaming beverage—coffee and tea also do the trick—can elicit a flood of positive feelings, according to a Yale University study. This may be because people associate physical warmth with emotional warmth, say the researchers. Study subjects held cups of either hot or iced coffee; those gripping warm mugs were more appreciative of friendliness in others and also felt more generous and trusting themselves.
*I love curling up at night to a cup of Trader Joe's herbal chai. It is soooo good.

9)You have two best friends

Among 654 married adults, those who said they had at least two “best friends” (not necessarily including one’s spouse) were likelier to have better mental well-being, says a study. But additional friends didn’t lead to any more happiness than just a pair.
*I do have at least a couple of best friends. I think that it is really interesting that having more than two good friends doesn't boost happiness.
There you have it folks. How did you rate your happiness after seeing these standards?

It's Cool to Be Corny

Today the kids and I volunteered at local elementary school for the first time doing "taste tables." The program is sponsored through the Corvallis Environmental Agency, and it is awesome. Basically, once a month, through the help of volunteers, each elementary serves a new produce during lunch grown by a local farmer. The whole idea is to get the kids excited about trying new foods and to teach them about where our food comes from, and I saw today how peer pressure can be a positive thing. Kids who wouldn't try the corn on the cob today eventually came back after they saw that all of their friends were trying and enjoying it. Corn is definitely an easier veggie to get kids to try than some, but I was amazed at how much all of the kids liked it. Kids were eating so much and wanting more and more, so they eventually had to tell the kids no more and that they had to go to recess. The best part is how excited Sofia was about helping. She wanted to make signs and look the part of the veggie and felt so cool when she was complimented on her attire, and she was soooo into helping pass the food out to the big kids. Next months pick is apples, and she is already scheming what she will wear. Gabe was not so into helping, but he just sat on the floor the whole time eating corn and looking at books. We will keep doing this at least until the baby is born, but what a great experience for the whole familia.

Hi, my name is Kara... and I'm a sucky blogger

Amazing how alike my kiddos look with a scowl on their faces. Maybe it is genetic :)??


Tonya and I at Lilith fair this summer. We got to see Sheryl Crow, Erika Badu, Colbie Callait etc... It was so fun.

Tonya's baby shower preparation.

One day Chris took the kiddos to the beach and aquarium so I could get stuff done at home all day.





Hello out there... whoo hoo... anybody there?? After a bit of encouragement, I am ready to come back to the world of blogging. Blogging is kind of like exercising. The more it is habit.. the easier it is, but when you have gone months and months without working out, and you can start to feel your bum jiggle when you run, it is overwhelming to think about getting in shape again. So.. I am not going to even attempt to do detailed catch up. I will just give you a summary, and I will be good to go. Here is what has been going on in our neck of the woods:
Chris:
-Chris is a busy dude as usual. Finishing up his Maters, tons of photography, back to teaching full time now, and trying to cram in every spare second with us.
-Chris was named Oregon Bride Magazine's best photographer south of Portland for the state of Oregon, so that was pretty exciting.
-He is struggling trying to find balance in his life..trying to figure out if there are things that he can cut, and he is loving the time he does have in our house.
-We appreciate Chris so much, and I am hoping that finishing his masters will lighten his load at least a little. He is a great daddy and husband.
Me:
-I am now 22 weeks pregnant with baby numero 3. Ultrasound could not determine sex of baby as his/her legs were closed... so it will be a surprise. I am feeling more girlish vibes... so we shall see if I am correct!
-I have been quite the tired/crazy hormonal gal this pregnancy. I had my normal sickness like I did with my other pregnancies, and now that I am much better... I am trying harder to take care of myself (aka... no more greasy take out and a little exercise).
-I love how with each pregnancy, you can feel baby move earlier and earlier. This little baby is moving all of the time. I was kind of hoping for a more mellow baby this time, but I guess that mellow is not in our gene pool :). I love this little baby so much already, and the kiddos are so excited.
*In between trips and visits from family and friends this summer, I worked on gardening and chicken raising. Our chickens are now laying eggs, and I already have plans of things I will do differently in my garden next year. It was a really cold summer (and seems like it will be a cold fall??), so we had lot's of success with some foods in our garden, and not as much with others. Oh, and I didn't know this before... but rats and mice really love the rainy country of Corvallis. We have been at constant war getting rid of rats that try to eat chicken food. If you want to see pregnant Kara get really crazy.... get me talking about my rat phobias.
*I have also been chilling at home with the kiddos more and staying home reading most nights (another thing keeping me from blogging). I have read a lot of good books, and it has honestly felt really good to be less social and hyper.

Sofia:
-Sofia will start preschool next week, and she is so excited. It is a co-op, so I will be helping out a lot in the classroom. I am also very excited, because since I teach for LBCCC, I didn't have to pay anything for her preschool for the term, so that is very nice.
-I could get all teary eyed thinking about how much Sofia has grown in the last few months, but she is such a great kid. She has her moments of whininess (sometimes much longer than moments usually), but she is such a sensitive and thoughtful little gal. She is really concerned about justice in the world and she is deeply offended when someone litters or does anything to wrong another person. She is also very perceptive, and never forgets anything.
-The other day we were talking about how people used to be really mean to black people and other people who were different from them, and that some people are still like that today. She has been trying so hard to understand this and several times has made comments like: "Mommy, I don't get why people think that they are better than anyone else. I guess that they don't know about Jesus." She is constantly saying things that teach me about the kind of person that I want to be.
-Sofia loves the Beavers. Like a lot. She keeps saying that she is going to trick all of our duck friends/family and have them to come to a "duck party", but really it will be a Beaver party.. and then everyone will love the Beavers as much as her. She is very excited to go some games with Chris and Gabe (and I may even be dragged along to a football game).

Gabe:
-As always, Gabe keeps us on our toes. We are really experimenting with him trying to figure out what to do to get that kiddo to listen more. It is really interesting trying to figure this kiddos personality out.
-He will be 3 in a a few weeks. I can't believe that my baby is going to be 3!! I sometimes fee like I try keeping Gabe in a baby roll... because I know that once the new baby is born, he is going to seem even bigger.
-Gabe is always telling us that he loves us, and he loves Sofia so much. They are starting to fight a lot, which can be frustrating, but they really do play well together overall.
-Gabe is so sweetly sensitive (kind of like his padre). The other day I was talking to him in my mama monster voice, because he refused to help clean up toys, and after running away crying, he immediately asked for a hug and said, "Mama, it makes me sad when you talk in that mean voice." Talking about ripping my heart out.
-Gabe has an crazy active imagination. He is in his own world half or the day running around, reading, or playing make believe. It amazes me how crayons or any object all of a sudden comes to life with Gabe with a voice. It is really amusing to sit and watch him play.
-Gabe is extremely determined. If I put his shirt on when he wanted to do it himself, he will take everything off and put it all on himself again.
-Gabe has been potty trained for a month now.. can I hear an "Hallelujah!!" He is still in a pull up at night, but it feels so luxurious to think that I will have only one kid in diapers when the baby is born.
-I am learning patience from this boy daily, and I am trying hard to savor his sweetness, and it will be fun to have some one on one time with him when Sofia is in preschool.

----That's about is folks. I wlll be back to report again soon!

Motherhood

Some of you have probably seen this already, but take the time to watch it. Touching.